Bending Time
My recent fascination has been this phenomenon called time dilation. I know it sounds like a clinical term; I didn’t pick the name, but here’s the gist of it: the idea is that we perceive time differently depending on what we are doing. Our brains store information in a few ways.
Way 1 is the normal day-to-day routine, which is stored in compressed piles of similar tasks (think brushing teeth, doing dishes, working, commuting, buying groceries, etc.). These all go into the same memory bank.
Way 2 is when you are doing something new or different, like going camping or traveling to a new place. This is stored more granularly as it’s a new experience, making the perceived time much longer even if it’s the same amount of time as Way 1. You can see this phenomenon when you go on a trip, and it feels much longer than it actually was.
Another spontaneous trip to SF, we went to the place I asked Heather to be my girlfriend (on February 13th 2011), as a fun anniversary trip
Anyway, the point of that explanation is to convey my second big breakthrough. My second breakthrough is that it’s not about the length of time, your lifetime, or your health span (like most of these health influencers are obsessed with). It’s really about how you spend your time. This is something I feel the younger generation has really figured out. They are not into the 9-5 grind, they don’t spend time at home or buy houses; they are traveling and enjoying their lives more, it seems.
There’s been a cultural shift from the Millennial and GenX generations’ "climb the ladder, and you’ll get a reward at the end" to the younger GenZ working generation since this paradigm has somewhat fallen short. The distribution of wealth hasn’t really paid back as much as our parents told us it would. I digress, but the point of this tangent is we need to start thinking about how we spend our time differently.
Things I’ve Done to Help My Time Bending:
Plan trips: My wife and I plan trips every 3 months.
From our recent trip to Tiburon. We did a staycation and chose to be tourists in one of our local spots
Spontaneity: I spontaneously reach out to friends to see if they want to hang out.
Travel: I drive distances I wouldn’t normally drive to see one thing I want to see or visit a friend I haven’t seen in years (in the middle of the week!).
My friend Neal was randomly in town and I drove to Palo Alto to have dinner with him in the middle of the week! (I totally wouldn’t do this normally, it’s over an hour in traffic), he’s a real special guy though.
Change routines: I run in places I haven’t run before when I work out in the mornings.
A local hill I rarely run up. I figured what the hell, why not? Now I do it quite often because it’s a spectacular view.
Photography: I take pictures more, which helps me look around and be more aware of my surroundings. It’s amazing how little I am aware of my environment.
Plan discomfort: I plan discomfort into my week, either by doing something really hard like a long run or by doing something I was afraid of doing (also called exposure therapy if you suffer from anxiety like me). You’ll realize once you start doing fear exposure how much time it feels like has passed in a very short period. Fear is a great way to bend time, lol.
Wake up early: Get up early to maximize the day.
Limit screen time: Spend less time on screens (this is HUGE). Just let yourself be bored for 5 seconds and sit with it. You’ll be inspired by the environment around you and let time pass slowly because that’s how we were supposed to be living (a blog for another day).
I know that was a lot. Some of these things are more accessible for privileged people, and I acknowledge that. Here’s something I think we can all do to bend time and feel like we are living just a little more each day:
Replace screen time: Replace your screen time in one part of your day with a book, magazine, taking photos, a walk, or some other activity that you enjoy that isn’t a digital device.
Do something creative: Spend an hour a day doing something creative. This could be a craft you’ve neglected over the years or just simply writing in a journal.
Plan an adventure: Plan an adventure that’s within your budget. It could be riding the bus down the street and going to a restaurant you’ve never eaten at, or it could be flying to a new country or place.
Break out of your routine: Break out of your routine once during the week. Either get up early and go somewhere different, bring a coffee and your breakfast and just sit there, or play hooky and take your partner somewhere for fun! This cannot be planned!
Embrace your younger self: Do something your younger self would do (please be safe). Things that I would normally do as a youngster include going to concerts, taking photos at night of random things with friends, or buying something you’ve always wanted but thought was too juvenile or inappropriate.
Hangout with people younger than you or live different lifestyles than you: This will help you expand what you do each day and naturally bring you out of your comfort zone. For me, pottery has really helped me connect with people I wouldn’t normally hangout with, find a group or friend that does things you might enjoy but wouldn’t normally do on your own.
Let’s start thinking about how we spend our time differently.
