Empty the Cup

Empty Your Cup to Make Room for Growth

“Empty your cup so that it may be filled; become devoid to gain totality.” – Bruce Lee

This mantra has been my guide every time I meditate, and lately, it’s taken on a deeper meaning. Life threw some serious curveballs at me this past month, and I’ve been reflecting on how to navigate these challenges while staying on a path of self-improvement.

It’s been rough—I won’t sugarcoat it. When things get difficult, I remind myself: You’ve trained for this. It’s in the darkest moments that your true character and abilities are revealed. And while this month tested me in ways I wasn’t prepared for, it also helped me uncover the importance of “emptying the cup” and making space for growth.

What Does “Emptying the Cup” Mean?

After reading the book Be Like Water my Friend, by Shannon Lee I realized I wasn’t giving myself space to grow. I was trying to build new habits and rituals while clinging to old ways of thinking. Imagine pouring water into an already full cup—it overflows, leaving no room for anything new. That’s what I was doing in my life.

To truly improve, you need to let go of what no longer serves you. This might mean giving up comforts like sleeping in or indulging in unnecessary purchases. Sacrifice is the price of meaningful growth.

I’ve seen this principle play out in different parts of my life. When I started learning pottery, I quickly discovered it’s not something you can dabble in and expect to master. It took me thousands of hours of failure and frustration before I started to see progress. The same was true when I trained for marathons—I had to sacrifice countless Saturday mornings for grueling long runs. Both taught me this: you can’t cling to the old version of yourself while striving to become someone new. You have to empty your cup.

Lessons from a Challenging Month

At the start of this journey, I thought I had everything figured out. My job was stable, my cats were healthy, and I had exciting holiday plans. Then life happened.

• I was laid off from my job.

• A sick cat turned my routine upside down.

• My 40th birthday plans were postponed so I could take care of our sick cat.

• Depression crept in, as it often does this time of year.

• An election outcome left me frustrated and disheartened.

I wanted to scream—and I did. I cried, ate some cake, and wallowed in frustration. But after that, I had to regroup. Life doesn’t stop for our setbacks, and the road to where you want to go rarely follows a straight line. It diverts, it throws up roadblocks, and sometimes you just need to pull over and take a breath. That’s okay. Progress is progress, even if it’s slow.

Key Takeaways: Navigating Life’s Challenges

Here’s what I learned from what I’ll now call “The November I’ll Never Forget”:

1. When the unexpected happens, let yourself feel it.
   Scream, cry, eat cake, or vent with friends. Acknowledge your emotions instead of repressing them.

2. Time box the tough phase.
   Give yourself a day or a week to feel all the feelings—but don’t let it drag on too long.

3. Dust yourself off and make a new plan.
   Adjust to the new reality and create a path forward, even if it’s different from what you originally envisioned.

4. Adapt and adjust.
   When things get harder, think of it like running into a headwind during a race—slow down if needed, but don’t stop moving forward.

5. Stay positive.
   Acknowledge the difficulty, but remind yourself that you’ve endured challenges before and can persevere again.

I can’t emphasize the friends part enough here. When you feel like crap it’s so important to ask for help and be around people. This is something I personally struggle with.

I’m realizing this is also a trauma response. Apparently when someone wants to be alone during hard times this is often because when they were young they had to deal with things on their own, I think it’s called hyper independence.

YAY SO MUCH PERSONAL GROWTH! (god it’s exhausting isn’t it?)

Embracing the Journey

This idea of “emptying the cup” has become central to my self-improvement journey. Whether it’s letting go of old habits, facing new obstacles, or adjusting to life’s curveballs, I’ve learned that growth requires sacrifice and resilience. Sometimes you’ll need to pause and take a breath; sometimes you’ll need to grit your teeth and push forward. Both are valid, as long as you’re moving toward your goals.

Let’s Navigate This Together

I started this blog to share my experiences and support others who might be facing similar challenges. Life is weird, messy, and hard—but it’s also full of opportunities to grow. If you’ve ever felt stuck or overwhelmed, know that you’re not alone.

What old habits or mindsets are holding you back? How are you making space for growth? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Let’s inspire and support each other through these strange and difficult times.